It takes support from friends and family members, as well as professionals, to help you get back on your feet. If you and your spouse are attempting to make one final effort to save your marriage, you have two options: see a divorce coach or a therapist. Choosing between the two might seem complicated, but understanding the differences between them can help enlighten you to make the right choice.
What is a divorce coach?
A divorce coach can be an exceptional option if you are looking to achieve actual tangible results. Consulting a divorce coach is one of the options available if you are in the process of divorcing your partner. Not only is there a lot of paperwork involved during a divorce, but it is also an emotional rollercoaster.
So, it can be difficult to manage your emotions on top of all the other things you need to take care of such as your kids, your house, your personal stuff, etc.
The concept of a divorce coach did not come into fruition until the early 2000s. These are professionals who act as financial mediators, attorneys, and psychotherapists in one. Their aim is to make it easier for anyone going through a divorce to handle the transition phase.
While this type of professional coaching service is still in its infancy, it is making great strides. To put it simply, divorce coaches assist people to emotionally process their divorce using coaching techniques and forward-focused techniques versus strictly psychological techniques. This means you are using goal-oriented strategies to work out how to navigate the next steps in your life.
If you are planning to hire such a coach, here are some of the ways that they can help:
A divorce coach can offer the intervention you need. It is not uncommon for couples going through a divorce to bicker. But arguing will not speed up the process of divorcing each other. A coach can intervene when both parties are too hostile to each other that they can’t manage to work together. He or she can handle the process so it moves at a more rapid pace. This makes it easier for you, and your former partner, to move on to the next chapter of your lives. Naked Divorce coaches are trained in Non-Violent Communication techniques and the founder Adele is a trained mediator and negotiator. These techniques are used in all our separation programs.
A divorce coach can provide insight into what you need to work on if you want to make the transition easier. The emotional aspect of divorce is probably more difficult than the legal side of it. Divorce coaches can offer their legal expertise in the process, but their ability to provide counseling can also be advantageous. They can encourage you to see the big picture so you won’t be overwhelmed by the challenges you face. This makes it easier for you to focus on your priorities and goals within the immediate future.
A divorce coach can guide you in making better decisions. Again, it is easy to be overwhelmed with emotions when you are going through the separation process. With the guidance of a professional, you can think logically and make decisions that aren’t driven by feelings.
A divorce coach can help in the process of rebuilding your life. Whatever your goal may be at the end of the divorce is irrelevant. But the aim for coaches is to help you turn that into reality. Through healthy conversations, they can help you come to terms with what happened in your marriage. Based on the analysis, they can offer advice on what changes you can make moving forward to achieve your goal.
A divorce coach can help the rest of the family (especially children) cope. Dealing with divorce becomes more complicated when there are kids involved. A professional can offer guidance and support for you and your kids as you rebuild your life. They can provide a safe place for you to turn to when the challenges become overwhelming. It is their goal to minimize the damage of divorce on your family.
A divorce coach can help you cope with the stress of the whole experience. Talking about the difficulties of going through a divorce can help ease the negative impact on your life. This is why coaches engage their clients in helpful conversations to address these stressors in positive ways. They can also recommend stress reduction techniques through muscle relaxation exercises and mindfulness meditation. Their goal is to help get rid of negative emotions such as frustration, anger, and sadness.
A divorce coach can help maintain your sanity. The presence of one in your life during this phase might be what you need to stay sane. It gives you confidence that someone is in your corner ready to provide emotional support and guidance when you need it most.
A divorce coach can lead you to other helpful resources. They can provide legal advice and emotional support, but they cannot give you all the help you need. But with their expertise, they can identify what other types of assistance you need for a successful recovery. They can offer more useful information and determine where you can go to for help (if necessary).
What Can Therapists Do?
A therapist can be an exceptional option if you looking to delve deep into past-based psychological issues related to a extreme reaction to your divorce. Spinning out can be utterly normal, but if your reaction is highly dysregulated and all over the place and you are unable to ground yourself, therapy is better for you.
A therapist’s role during divorce recovery might seem similar to a divorce coach. This is one of the reasons why most people often assume they are one and the same. But there is actually a significant difference in what they can do.
A divorce therapist is someone who is hired to initially provide counseling for divorced couples (or an individual). In some cases, marital counselors or therapists are used by partners as a last-ditch effort to save their marriage. However, it is not uncommon for couples contemplating divorce to not share the same level of enthusiasm about seeing a therapist. A therapist is best if you feel highly traumatised. You may require 6-12 months of therapy to recover. Coaching is for people who have distress but seek a structured approach for recovery.
Should you choose coaching or therapy?
There are differences in the roles that coaches and therapists play in the divorce process. Deciding which of the two to work with can be difficult but, hopefully, this post has cleared up some of your confusion.
It’s recommended to work with a divorce coach if you want to handle the practicalities of the situation, seek a plan and want to process what happened without going too far back into your childhood and abandonment issues. You will get to the source of why your marriage failed but without all the distress and trauma reliving. They can offer the services of a therapist and a divorce lawyer in one. They help you with the practical steps and information needed when filing for divorce. At the same time, they can offer support for your intra- and inter-personal challenges during a divorce.
On the other hand, divorce therapists are a good option if you want to dig deeper into your childhood and the issues regarding how your marriage failed.